Skool Bus (Skit): …what the hell am I getting me into with this one? I’m very confused.
Perry Aye (ft. A$AP Rocky, A$AP Nast, Playboi Carti and Jaden Smith): Beyond being nothing I haven’t heard before, I don’t understand what the hell Jaden Smith is doing here, what the hell they are doing to his voice, and where the hell Will was when his son was recording for this track. Yeah, this one was really bad. I hope I can actually make it through this damn album now.
Please Shut Up (A$AP Rocky, Key! and Gucci Mane): The hook on this one is so bad, it’s honestly laughable. This song is beyond boring, beyond unexciting, this song is just horrific. This is one of those songs where, if you look in the YouTube comments for the music video, you’ll see something like “this makes me want to play the Wii without the wrist strap on” or something like that.
Blowin’ Minds (Skateboard) (ft. A$AP Rocky, A$AP Nast, A$AP Ant, Chief Keef, and Playboi Carti): I’m not gonna lie, I was really excited when I heard the first few seconds of this, but my excitement was for naught because this turned out to be a painfully unoriginal, really boring song with some less-than-stellar performances all around. Things aren’t looking good so far.
Black Card (ft. A$AP Rocky and Smooky Margielaa): Not only does this feel far too short and far too boring, but it’s honestly kinda sad to me that a 15-year old kid outperforms A$AP Rocky on this one (it’s not like he saves the song or anything, but he does far better than Rocky in my eyes). Was the A$AP Mob so desperate to do something exciting that they just said “let’s bring a 15-year old onto this track because we can’t do much better?”
Walk on Water (ft. A$AP Twelvyy, A$AP Ant, A$AP Nast, A$AP Ferg and Playboi Carti): Ridiculously annoying hook to go along with some really repetitive, unoriginal sounding music. I got to the 1:30 mark and told myself “it feels like this has been going on forever.” That said, it’s not one of the worst on the album because A$AP Ferg’s verse is not half bad. That’s the nicest thing I can say about this album so far, though.
BYF (ft. A$AP Rocky, A$AP Ant and Smooky Margielaa): Once again, 15-year old Smooky Margielaa outclasses everyone else on this one. Overall, though, while I was very excited when this one started (I liked the instrumentals), I wasn’t too fond of any of the verses outside of Smokey’s, and the hook was really boring to me. Could’ve been far worse, but also could’ve been way better.
Get the Bag (ft. A$AP Rocky, A$AP Ferg, A$AP Ant, A$AP Nast, A$AP TyY, Playboi Carti and Smooky Margielaa): Unfortunately, Smooky takes a step back with his performance on this one. Fortunately, this one actually isn’t half bad: the other members, for the most part, bring in some pretty solid performances. Still, it does feel like it goes on far too long. So far, this is better than some of the other tracks on the album, but that’s not saying much.
Bahamas (ft. A$AP Rocky, A$AP Ferg, A$AP Twelvyy, Lil Yachty, Key!, Schoolboy Q and Smooky Margielaa): At first, I was really impressed by the much faster rapping on this one, especially by Lil Yachty, who I don’t particularly like much. Unfortunately, while the flow is really solid on this one, it starts to feel repetitive because, even if it’s fast, there’s not enough variety here. You can rap super fast and, yeah it’s definitely impressive, but it can start to feel like a gimmick when the fast rapping follows the same formula throughout, and that’s what happens here. What makes it worse is that there are 7 rappers on this track, all of them following that same formula. Certainly not the worst this album has to offer, but it could’ve been much shorter and far more varied.
Principal Daryl Choad (Skit): Not another unfunny, boring skit…
Frat Rules (ft. A$AP Rocky, Playboi Carti and Big Sean): Oh look, yet another song that I’ve already heard a million times before! Again, I was really excited because the instrumental sound was interesting, but the song just ended up feeling really boring and repetitive, complete with yet another forgettable, overly long chorus.
FYBR (First Year Being Rich) (ft. A$AP Twelvyy, A$AP Rocky, A$AP Ant, A$AP Ferg, Key! and Playboi Carti): You know what’s sad? Before this album, I’d never even heard any of A$AP Mob’s songs, and I feel like I’ve already heard every single one of their songs from this one song alone. At this point, they’re just boring, and for a group that’s all about turn-up music, never has a turn-up group made me want to fall asleep so badly. This song just feels like every other rap song these days, not just every A$AP song, but it just sounds like a bunch of other rap songs. It also ends horrifically. Like, it doesn’t even care, it just shrugs and then ends. These last five songs better be incredible.
Feels So Good (ft. A$AP Rocky, A$AP Ferg, A$AP Nast, A$AP Twelvyy and A$AP Ant): At this point, A$AP Mob just seems really content with sticking to their comfort zone. It’s tiring repeating that this sounds like way too many other songs, but unfortunately, it’s true. It’s honestly tiring just trying to make it through this album when pretty much every song sounds exactly the same and doesn’t try to explore new territory.
Coziest (ft. A$AP Twelvyy and Zack): The only thing that makes this song “cozy” is the cozy feeling you get when this song successfully puts you to sleep with its bland, unoriginal repetitiveness.
What Happens (ft. featuring A$AP Rocky, A$AP Ferg, A$AP Twelvyy, Playboi Carti, Joey Badass, Kirk Knight, Nyck Caution, Meechy Darko and Zombie Juice): Instrumentally, I actually appreciate that this one tries to do something different, and the beat is pretty cool-sounding. I only wish that the actual rapping was as exciting and different as the beat is.
RAF (ft. A$AP Rocky, Playboi Carti, Quavo, Lil Uzi Vert and Frank Ocean): Once again, I like what’s going on instrumentally here, but I’m not crazy about any of the performances here, not even Lil Uzi Vert’s, or Frank Ocean's. It’s not one of the worst on the album, but it’s such a painfully unoriginal end to the album.
Last Day of Skool (Skit): Oh, thank God it’s finally over!
Okay...to the person that requested this…DO YOU HATE ME?!?!?! DO YOU HATE HAPPINESS?!?!?! HAVE YOU MADE THIS REQUEST TO TORMENT ME?!?!?! That was a complete and utter nightmare! I’m gonna go against the Metacritic score and say that this album is a trainwreck. From start to ugly finish, this thing lacked originality, it lacked energy, it lacked fun, it just lacked! It severely lacked. I wanted to like this album, I tried to enjoy these songs, I tried to nod my head and jam along, but I can’t force myself to do that with these songs that, despite being 3 and 4 minutes, all feel like hour-long marathons! It's very hard for me to really dog on an entire album: it needs to frustrate, annoy or bore me on levels that few others can reach. This album actually managed to do all three. Congratulations, A$AP Mob, you’ve brought out the rage. Don’t listen to this album, please. Don’t even try.
Favorite track: Literally none of them.*
Least favorite tracks: I’d say all of them, but there were some I hated more than others, so...Perry Aye, Please Shut Up, Blowin' Minds (Skateboard), Black Card, and FYBR (First Year Being Rich) are the worst of the worst.
Rating: Awful
(*"Get The Bag" was originally listed as a favorite, but after giving it multiple re-listens, it fell out of favor with me. The review remains unchanged despite this, but the song was once listed as a favorite.)
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